Feb 1, 2010

Here it is..

Kenny and I are not together anymore. I hope I have the strength to do what it takes to get this baby here safe and sound. I didn't have that strength before, with Zoe, obviously. I failed to mention before that the specialist I saw told me he could see no other reason for her death but me.
I hope I don't kill this one too, for how would I ever survive the guilt. Like my dad said yesterday, "Be careful, cause if something happens to this baby, you will hate yourself."
And he's right.

17 comments:

Mary said...

Oh Lindsay. I pray that strength continues to blossom for you and you little one. It takes a strong woman to get to where you are. I know you can do it.

I can't believe that the doctor said that to you. As if we don't struggle with enough guilt everyday. ((Hugs))

Jennifer Ross said...

I'm so sorry to hear this Lindsay....and I can't believe that doctor! Unbelievable!!!!

T said...

So very sad to hear this news.
Sending you much love and support...

Catherine W said...

Oh Lindsay. I'm so sorry that you and Kenny aren't together anymore.
That specialist should never, ever have said that to you. Honestly, I do wonder why some people ever become doctors when they seem to have so very little compassion.
Thinking of you and sending love and strength. I'm so sorry that you are going through such a tough time. xo

m said...

oh my gosh, Lindsay! I am so sorry. For so many things. So sorry that there seems to be an immense amount of guilt and pressure being put on you right now.

And I don't think that's right.
And I don't think that's fair.

I just want to send you LOVE and SUPPORT (and honestly, I never use all caps so you know I mean it ;-) )

hang in there L.

niobe said...

Thinking of you.

Jill said...

I am so sorry to hear about you and Kenny. I hope everything works out for you. I am thinking about you! xo

Lea said...

Oh Lindsay... I have been thinking about you and wondering where you have "been"... I'm so sorry about you and Kenny. Must be very painful. I am so sorry you are carrying such a burden. Guilt is horrible. Please take care of yourself and your precious babe. You can do it. We are all sending you as much strength as possible.

margaret said...

I'm here for you honey. It's a terrible time to be going through such stress and feelings of guilt. You did not "cause" your abruption no matter what that doctor said to you. Please try to rest, relax if you can, get lots of sleep and eat right. I know it may be hard to do right now but try to stay focused on that sweet baby boy. Sending you hugs

With Out My Punkin said...

((((((HUGS))))))) You did nothing to cause what happened before. I'm sorry to hear about you and Kenny.

Anonymous said...

Oh my Dear, I am so sorry to hear about you and Kenny... I know you are strong and in (I assume) a lot less stress that in your pregnancy with Zoe. I can't believe what the "specialist" said.. What bullshit!

I hope you know that there's always someone to vent, cry, rant or scream on the other side of the world. During day or sleepless nights... gimme a shoutout and I'll be there.

Big loves!

still life angie said...

Oh, Lindsay, I am just so sorry to read about you and Kenny. Always here if you need me. XO

SadMommy3434 said...

(((HUGS))) Lindsay!

Anonymous said...

I am so very sorry.
(((hugs))) and prayers

Penny said...

I'm sorry, Lindsey. Hope everything turns around for you soon. Praying for a healthy little boy. You're over half way there.

Tina said...

Oh Lindsay I am so sorry to hear this this! Please take good care of yourself and your sweet little one. xx

Bree said...

Thinking of you Lindsay. I'm sorry you're going through this now.