Jan 31, 2009

This week in La La Land...and a Question...

Wow, this week has flown by! I got some house work and some cooking done today. Now I'm taking a few minutes to blog, before dinner.
I wanted to tell you a little about Serious Life Magazine. It is a publication for Christian families, and my blog is featured in their directory. To learn more about this magazine and how to receive it yourself, go to: http://www.seriouslifemagazine.com/. It is published by the awesome father of a great family. I have been praying for their little daughter Abby who sadly has leukemia. So check that out for sure.
As far as family news, a few furry little creatures have lost their lives around here this week. We apparently have a less than tame cat running around. I know, that's what they do, right? Sadly though, two of the furry creatures were my daughter's mice, Love Bug and Mrs.Brisby. Their deaths led to ANOTHER conversation with my L.O. about death, and why God only saves some things/people and not others. (You get the drift, as I know alot of us have these SAME thoughts)
She always want to talk about what's troubling her at night, after we pray. She tells me who may have hurt her feelings that day. She hints of issues she's struggling with or anything she's wondered about God. She asks me if she'll have to grow up alone, or if God will give her another sister. I'm glad she talks to me about these things. I hope she always does.
While I'm on the subject, I need a little advice. I have thought about buying L.O. a tiny silver necklace. I want to hang it on Zoe's rose tree, with a letter from Zoe, and let L.O. find it. I don't think this is any worse/better than the tooth fairy or Santa Clause(thinking about not doing that this year, possibly). I mentioned this to my room mate (she's not a Christian) and she replied, "No, No you can't do that! We don't get presents from dead people! I think that is a terrible idea and not good for her. Tell her it's from you to remember Zoe, DO NOT let her think her sister left it for her!" I don't see the harm in leaving trinkets around on special occasions. L.O. is missing out on Zoe's life too. Is this not a sweet way to help her feel connected to a sister she didn't get to grow up with? If you have an opinion, good or bad (but not mean, please) PLEASE leave me a comment. When I first had the idea, it seemed sweet, but now I wonder if it could somehow be detrimental? Tell me what you think.
On a different note, I received a hope chest, from my boyfriend for Christmas. (he's a prop maker for Hollywood movies, and he made and inlaid it by hand!) I had been storing a lot of Zoe's things at my mother's until I received my hope chest, but I went and got most of it Friday. I plan on taking photos of the chest and it's contents this week. I'm trying to finish writing about Zoe's nearly three weeks on earth, but feel stuck. I believe sharing my memories with you here, will spark my memory of the many details. I did not have a lot of support until late last year. I felt very alone in my grief and had no idea that so many women worldwide had lost their precious little ones. Now, I see how other children have been memorialized, and I owe it to my daughter to make sure she isn't forgotten.

To the baby lost mommas that follow/visit my blog, and a lot of the blogs I follow, I want you to know that EVERY day I light candles and say prayers for different babies and their mommies. I know how much comfort we need, and how alone we can feel. In praying for you, God soothes my soul as well. So, thank you for allowing me part, in your own personal journeys.
Much Love


Granny on the Web said...

So sorry to hear of your sad loss. My daughter lost one of her identical twins 10 years ago. It was a very hard time for her and the family. I pray for your continued strength in the Lord's blessings.
As to the gift 'from' Zoe, in my humble opinion it would be best not to say it is from her, but to acknowledge her quiet presence still in your lives, as she will be for a long long time.
Love Granny (*!*)